Why you should be glad You don't have it all Figured Out Yet
Every day you think to yourself, "I'm going to be great." You may not know what that means or how it is going to become your reality but you think it. For a moment, you believe yourself. Of course, you're going to be great. Well, you have to be because you can't imagine your life as anything else. Of course, you can't be average, you want that fancy shoe and a fabulous life; but most of all, maybe, just maybe, you have a message to share. You could change the world. But How? Changing the world is a lot and so daring. You're not sure if you can.
Take a moment. Do what people in this age do. Scroll down mindlessly through your social media feed. Oh no, here we go again. Fabulous lifestyles. Everyone has it all figured out. Everyone is living their dreams. Someone's just struck it rich. Someone's speech or action has just changed the world. And you, you're just still scrolling.
Maybe you could be those people - if someone could just help you figure your life and purpose out and help you get rid of negative thoughts. Or maybe there's something wrong somewhere or with you. I understand how you feel my friend, and that's why instead of writing a post about how to figure out your life or find your purpose, I am giving you something more potent. I'm telling you that you should embrace this period of "not knowing" because that's where your "knowing" comes from.
If there's one person who's good at overthinking, it's me. I could overthink everything into tiny bits. Not that it's a good thing but hang on a second, you'll get where I'm going with this:) So yeah. I'm the girl that spent a good two months just trying to come up with a brand color palette because I wanted it to perfectly "fit" and not be changed the next week. Yes. Once upon a time, I needed everything to be so perfect, I overthought everything (if that's a word) and never got anything done. Sigh.
So when I got to the place in my life that I felt like I wasn't figuring anything out and my life was boring and messy, I did what I did best. Overthink. I tried to come up with stuff, read a little bit about finding your purpose, got right into bed, pulled on those warm covers and my thinking cap, and roollleeeddd on forever. After months of frustration, I decided to drop my craft and find something less draining to do. Let me not tire you with the details, because I love details and I won't stop, but what happened is I came across something in a video I watched that hit home for me and will answer you, my friend. Are you ready?
Don't worry. It's just a simple truth that will show you how you've been trying to figure your life out the wrong way and that you have to embrace this stage of little or no clarity in your life. It was put simply put by the legendary Marie Forleo. Okay here goes:
At first, it didn't make enough sense to me but as I sat that there muttering it over and over to myself, I realized my purpose won't just dawn on me if I stayed in bed doing nothing.
So what am I saying?
You will get your life all figured out soon. Of course, you will. You know why? Because you don't know how. I believe that if in the very depths of your hearts you decide that you want to change a situation or a state of being, you will figure something out. Of course, you will, you're a champ! Don't ever forget that. Now that you know you don't want to remain in this state of not knowing what your life is about; not knowing what fulfills you and not being able to figure out what to do next, you have what you need to change it. In the quest for change, awareness of the undesired state must come first, then desire follows.
Now that you know clarity comes engagement not thought, stop trying to think too much about getting your purpose to pop in your head while you sit and rack your precious brain. This is the time you're not sure, and you don't know which thing fits, or how to get to the goal, and frankly, that's the best thing. Why? Because you get to try new things and figure out which one will work for you and what won't, and what's more, you get to bring the knowledge of all the things you learned with you.
Of course, you can't decide if you're good at painting or you want to spend the rest of your life doing it by just thinking. Try it. You make mistakes. Try it again. It's not your thing so you want to write. Amazing! Give that too a try. It works for you. Even better. Now see how you describe your scenarios so well. People sit back and marvel at how you seem to paint pictures with your words because you describe things and write poetry with so much dexterity that they can't believe you're real. They don't know that you really do what you do the way you do it because you have painted before and to you, all art must come alive. You learned that the hard way because initially, you thought you wasted time getting into painting only to realize it's such a good fit. Now you incorporate your knowledge into your fit and it makes you stand out.
Another reason why you should be glad you haven't figured your life out yet? You get to learn more about yourself. Let just say from your experience with painting, you found that coming into contact with so many colors make you hyper, even so many airy fresh pastel colors. (I know that's not the best of examples but still) You wouldn't have known about your strange reaction to colors by thinking or imagining. Now you know that the best time to be around so many colors is definitely not before bed or when you have a formal meeting to attend. You know more about yourself. You can make new decisions with the knowledge of what works for you and what doesn't and you can embrace your individuality. I promise you that the journey of learning more about yourself will be full of such pleasant surprises, you'll be so glad you embarked on it.
One more thing. This journey of figuring your life out will give you a story to tell so you can help people with not just what you've seen, but what you've experienced. Now imagine you went for a show and the host was interviewing someone in whose shoes you want to be in a few years and they kept rambling about how easy life has been and how they never made mistakes but were born with the intuition to tell who they were, where to find the money and resources and life is just a fairy tale. Clearly, your life isn't like that and so are the lives of countless people out there. Would this person be of value without a compelling and inspiring story of discoveries, successes and learns? (just because there are no fails) I didn't think so either.
So yeah. This is your moment. Try new things. If you don't have the means to, learn about it. Pick that free course. Ask those questions. Yes, some people figured their lives out earlier than you and you can't change that. Here's what you can do. You can be grateful that you can use this time where you haven't figured out your life to serve as a tool to figure it out, by being open to growth, change, learning, and discovery. Rather than just sit and be confused and comparing, do something. Take that risk. It is only in this "not knowing" that lies your ambition and drive and curiosity.
What about your purpose you wonder. I could give you thousand and one steps that could help you find it. But for now, there are two things you need to know. One, you will know when you find your purpose because something in you will just click, you'll be so fulfilled,
and two, my love, don't stop till you find that something.